The powers that be have decided that I have gotten a little too personal on the main magazine here of late, and for that I apologize. The only reason I did that is because I now have a grand, long range vision. But I forgot to explain all the important steps along the way.
I wanted to make you all Generals, but I didn’t take you through basic training or give you the ability OR opportunity to win battles and campaigns and all that – as I have done. For that I apologize. I got excited and went “too fast.” So, I’ll slow it down.
This post is for people who want to take action and who want to do something about the problems that are afflicting them in their daily lives – the problems we’re all very familiar with. I am going to give you the basic building blocks in this post, and we will combine them in a way which will make sense. In future posts, I will give you tactics to be individually successful. After that, we can talk about groups.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. First, we need to focus on individuals. Consider this “basic training” if you must. The war metaphor is apt but do not take it literally – remember, brothers, this is a completely non-violent approach.
The most important thing you need for this process to work, the fundamental building block, is belief that you can actually do something about any problems you perceive are bothering you – belief in yourself. If you do not have this belief, then everything else I say is going to be meaningless. I have laid out a path for you to acquire this belief. If you already have it, then read on, otherwise, I recommend you go back to these posts and try again. If you do not believe that anything can be done and you’re banging your head against my previous posts, then just ignore me from here on out. I probably won’t be writing the kinds of articles you would like to read.
The above process took me 5 years, so it could take you a while. Then again, I had to figure out how to do it on myself – nobody dropped out of the sky (or into my internet machine) to say “hey there you! Do this and it’ll work!” Your results may vary.
Okay, so you have your belief, right? Good. That forms our base. Next, you need a willingness to act on that belief. That should be simple enough – if you believe enough, then the willingness to act will come naturally. You’ll gain more confidence to act as you build a record of success in your actions. It will help if you perceive what you might call “losses” as “lessons,” as well. After all, what do you really have to “lose” by trying to talk to other people and convince them that they should stop thinking poorly?
I know what you’re going to say. But J. Durden – they can take this and that away from me, because I can be accused of harrassment and rape and all of that! Very true, brother. This is why you have to be careful. Follow my guidance and I’ll teach you how to be careful. I suppose you’ll just have to trust me on this point, but for right now, focus on believing in yourself.
So we have two fundamental elements. We need a third element before we can really have anything substantial. That third element is proficiency with human communication skills. This may sound daunting, because there are many different skills to build in the human communication skill set. I want to build confidence so here’s what I suggest, if you are apprehensive about your skill set – start mastering the communication method you are most comfortable in. Some people prefer face-to-face as opposed to internet-based; some prefer just the opposite. Don’t let anyone tell you which is “best,” because what is best in theory isn’t best for you.
Stick to your guns!
If you think I’m “selling” you a load of bull – consider this. I’m not asking for your money, am I? Nor am I requiring you to do any of the things I suggest you do – I’m freely offering my helpful and experienced advice. It is up to you whether or not you want to believe in it, enough to give it a shot anyway. You don’t have to buy my book on “The Game” to start bridging that gap between the genders and to get what you really want – speaking of which, I should write a post on that later.
In my next post, we’ll be putting all these pieces together. Until next time, brothers!