22 Kislev 5775

10:50 PST

Going to try to start using Jewish calendar. Talked to [Ryan] about how I had ordered Names of God translation and he alerted me to ISR which I immediately ordered. Waiting on service to begin; perhaps 10 people gathered although most were on time today!

[Ryan] prayer: Jeremiah 11:1-5, 12:17, John 21:12-19

1 John 3:18, 4:20

Jeremiah 17:5-10

[Pastor]: Psalm 138

John 17

15:45 PST

I wanted to wait until I had a more accurate – if that is the word – translation of the scriptures before I dove into this topic, but I feel the need to write my thoughts.

I’ve sampled some of organized Christianity for a few years now and I see two major issues that do not sit right with me. The first is that people go on and on about “knowing the LORD” and “knowing Jesus” but they neither know the Father’s nor the Son’s name! The second issue has to do with our performance of love.

I could elaborate on the name but people may miss the point. As regards love, Yeshua said the world would know his disciples by the love they have for each other. The apostle “John” wrote that if we cannot love the brother whom we we see, how can we love the creator who we cannot? Moreover he admonished the called out ones to love not in word or tongue but in deed and action.

[Psalms 51:16-17, James 1:21-27, 1 John 3:18, Luke 6:46-49]

David writes that YHWH does not desire sacrifice nor burnt offering. James writes about the folly of hearing and not doing. Yeshua himself laments how readily people will call him “Lord, Lord” and yet do not do the things that he says.

Many will tell you many things about how to “get spiritual.” While you sometimes might find a scriptural example of a particular ritual, you’d be hard pressed to find any Biblical character teaching it as a rule. Other than… do the Word!

12/12/2014 – 12/13/2014

12:53 PST

[Bob] called to pray. Perhaps he took to heart what I said about relationships.

Is it childish, immature and unfair of me to have tested my brethren so? Probably. On a long enough timeline, everyone fails this test.

12/13/2014 11:40 PST

Patreon video done, still not sure about launching the page. Giving my TV to [Pastor]’s son. Mention of $200 possibly but I’d be okay with lunch.

[Eric] and others were supposed to get in touch about doing a couple different things today, but nothing yet. Last night I almost tried to reach out to [Asa] or [Jenny] to vent about a lack of confidants but decided better.

I grew up spoiled. I had Kai, and we spent hours on end talking to each other about everything. Even friends in B.L.E. [the Bellingham LAN Experiment] were like that – DiscoDave, for example. I really regret the immature way I terminated that relationship.

I really regret the immature way I’ve terminated a lot of relationships. I was especially mistrustful and thus venomous to the opposite gender. If I took an inventory of serious friends I have anymore, I think I could only really name [Pastor]. I won’t use the tired “Jesus is my friend too” cliche, because for one his name is Yeshua and for two I’ve been snubbing him for a few months.

For a long time I have considered the paradox that is “being understood.” The very means by which we seek to understand one another are the same ones from which misunderstandings are birthed. We suppose that if we “speak” the same language – English, for example – that we will be understood. But often a listener will decipher a different meaning for a particular word or phrase due to context, non-verbals, personal quirks or a host of other factors. Over time – months, years – unaddressed miscommunications pile up and isolation mounts. Also, given how intwined language and thinking are, a person born in Japan speaking Japanese¬†thinks differently¬†from an English speaker. Some of their thoughts can only be messily translated to English, if they can come across at all.

[Editors note: I could republish some old writing I had written along these lines, but I think some of it is still available at http://the-spearhead.com under the pen name J. Durden or JJ Durden. Likewise there’s a blogspot domain floating around where I authored some things under the same pen name, http://jjdurden.blogspot.com]

Small wonder, then, most college courses seem to open with a “define the subject in your own words” exercise before the instructor mercifully clarifies the course of study.

18:40 PST

Will hopefully have the apartment more or less cleaned out by tonight. Then it’s just a matter of giving away furniture and hiring a cleaning service to do things I can’t (since I don’t own a vacuum, etc).

[Pastor] said charge $15 a month. Ha ha!

Need to get back into disciplined scriptural study. Want to pick up a Names of God translation.

1st Peter 4:3-4!!